Forgiving Others

 

This is my friend Marji Laine, who I met at the Blue Ridge Writer's Conference in May of 2013. She is a homeschooling mom of 4 with the oldest working in the mission field in Africa. She spends her days transporting to and from volleyball, teaching writing classes at a local coop, and directing the children’s music program at her church.

With decades of leading worship, directing and performing in theatre productions, and script-writing, Marji took the plunge to creating scintillating Christian romance and romantic suspense novels with a side of Texas sassy. She invites readers to unravel their inspiration, seeking a deeper knowledge of the Lord’s Great Mystery that invites us all. She has written a devotional blog post for this week.

MarjiLaine.com

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Jesus spoke often of the need to forgive. “For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.” Matthew 6:14-15. (NAS)

He wants us to practice forgiveness, but how? I don’t know about you, but personal attacks against my family or my kids bring out the momma bear in me. Such affronts leave a bitter residue that makes forgiving a difficult task.

And yet, letting the frustration of an insult continue to smolder destroys a joyful attitude. That’s why Paul instructs in Eph. 4:26-27 “In your anger, do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry and do not give the devil a foothold.” (NIV)

I remember one time someone completely misunderstood me. That person, imagining a slight, proceeded to twist my words and secretly spout what a horrible person I was to those within our circle. By the time I found out what was happening, the person had moved away. Robbing me of confrontation.

And for years, I rehashed the conversations I wanted to have, not only with the person responsible, but with all of those who actually believed the lies. With every moment I spent on the imagined confrontations, bitterness curled around my heart like kudzu.

The cure? Prayer. Not the type of prayer I initially had where I proceeded to relive the anger under the premise of talking to God about it. Like He didn’t already know. And that only succeeded in getting me all stirred up again.

The prayer I needed, the one that really started to help me heal, didn’t come until I longed to forgive the injury, but realized that I didn’t know how. I had to make it up as I went along. When the conversations started drifting into my mind, I started praying blessings on the injuring party. And no, I didn’t ask for the blessing of conviction. (Though I did think about it!)

I prayed God would bless with love, family, health, finances, purpose, and a rich relationship with Him. Well, that’s what I ultimately prayed. What I started out praying was something like, “God I can’t bring myself to ask blessings on that person. Could you please make me want to ask for those blessings?”

A slow process, but well-worth the effort. The object of my prayer received blessings and I received the grace to forgive. Win-Win!

Your turn: How have you learned to forgive others?

My latest collaborative novella, A Dozen Apologies, deals with forgiveness. Mara had humiliated so many men, but having accepted Christ as her Savior, she felt she must attempt to right the wrongs she’d committed. She sets out to find each of them. But they have an equally hard task of forgiving her. To read Mara’s story, find the posts on Write Integrity Press and watch for the notice of the free e-book. (WriteIntegrity.com)